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The Woman Who Saved Me

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A Snippet from Brita Corradini’s Website:

Three years ago, the word cancer filled my entire life.  Each day was spent talking about it, prodding it, quietly desperate for someone to save me from a body that I thought had betrayed me.  I was diagnosed with an aggressive form of stage II breast cancer a week after my 31st birthday, with my one year old daughter by my side and while 5 1/2 months pregnant.  My life filled me with terror, and to save what little face I had left, I started writing about the grizzled details of my transformation.

It was that moment I realized that I was more than a cancer victim.  I was a witty writer, a brave soul that bared my heart and bald head to give inspiration to those around me.  My journey was not a paved path, but a tumultuous ocean.  It crashed on and around me, dragging me beyond my comfort zone, painfully sanding down my thoughts of self and the purpose of my life.

I now meet you at this moment, a multitude of worlds and lives behind me.

Guest Article by Brita Corrandini

A week after my 31st birthday, I was diagnosed with an aggressive form of stage II breast cancer. I had a one-year old little girl and was 5 ½ months pregnant with my second child. One might say I felt slightly overwhelmed by the cards dealt to me, and this started my alignment path. My doctors insisted that this was a scary situation and my only hope was to follow their instructions to the letter. And follow I did, until the day it wasn’t working any longer. Then I found an amazing naturopathic doctor that strongly recommended $1,000 per month in supplements and consultations. And I happily aligned myself to this new protocol, until the day I could no longer afford it. Panic ensued, and I fled to the safe haven of books. I read up on cancer survivors, healing herbs, cannabis oil, shaman retreats and meditation experts. I aligned myself with each and every one diligently. I knew there had to be someone or something that could save me from the body that had failed me by allowing cancer to sneak in. This was how I spent the first couple years of my “healing” journey. And while I was technically cancer-free, I never felt like I enjoyed the life or body I was living in. And it was equally miserable for my husband, who could never catch up to what we were allowed to eat and what was on the “don’t you dare” list.

“I’m reading this sensational book and I now realize we should only be eating food in its raw, primitive state. Throw away that black bean burrito!” Two weeks later, “Actually, this book on Paleo living makes complete sense. I understand that as an Italian, you think you’ll die without cheese, but it’s the devil and we’re throwing it all out.” Four weeks later, “If our kitchen is Feng Shui, we will digest our food better.” And it wasn’t just food fads that I aligned with. It was vitamins, alternative doctors, EFT experts, educated bloggers and ancient shaman practices. If you could show me the science behind it, I was yours. I was yours until the next book I picked up. Then I would find equally convincing facts about a different way to eat/live/parent/pray/save and I’d giddily skip behind their rules and regulations. I was a glutton for following these ways of life. You might ask why I seemed so desperate to find the “correct” way to live. Why so many of us devour other’s achievements of health and wealth as if they might rub off on our weary attempts to get this life right. What I am discovering has the potential to shift you into a deep, gorgeous, satiating life.

My unrealistic ideals pulled us closer and closer to a breaking point. And break it did. It broke in a strange way though. I expected to get sick again, or have my husband leave me or even live this life till the painful, bitter end. However, on a whim, we moved our family of four to a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. And Maui broke me. Or is breaking me as we speak. I could no longer hide behind the noisy downtown apartment or with the constant groups of enjoyable friends that circled our days. Our life became slow and quiet. We found ourselves sharing a plot of land with ancient trees and thousands of geckos. And I started spinning. Every week was a new book and a new way, and I finally wore myself out.

I gave up on everyone and everything. I stopped trying. And that was when I heard it. “You don’t feel like eating that, you’re just tired.” “Just breath.” “You’re not angry at your daughter for acting fussy. You’re frustrated that your own needs aren’t being met right now.” “Embrace this moment, there is nothing else you need to do right now.” This sweet, soft voice was me. Not the “me” that scattered herself all over the map, praying to turmeric and the new moon for healing. Not the “me” that berated herself over a gobbled down candy bar. This me was continually calm, collected, and incredibly wise. This me knew the best route to take, but also understood and came alongside when I took the less beneficial path. And I found out that it isn’t that complicated after all. It was all about self-alignment.

We could go into quantum physics to aptly explain this, but I would prefer to keep your attention, so I’ll put it in the terms that my wise self used when explaining it to me. Your stunning mind is behind it all. Not willingly, not purposefully, not vindictively, but it’s pulling your down a dirty rabbit hole. Your thoughts are often chaotic, often of victim mentality, often doomsday. Have you heard the things you think lately? And then you throw in a few well-meaning people with their own opinions of what and how and when and you’ve got yourself a mess. Pick up a magazine or two with life guiding articles and you feel like the world is sitting on your face and you can’t find an ounce of oxygen to save your life. Slightly dramatic, but most of us have felt a version of that.

You might find it funny that I am going to suggest that you stop listening to others until you’ve found your internal footing, yet here I am telling you to listen! If I’m honest, it was a passage in a book that finally clicked my self-alignment to the on position. And he did it without telling me what to think, just how to think for myself. I am doing my best to keep my opinions and preferences out of this article so you can connect with yourself through these words. So, put down the books, the webinars and the facts. Just breathe for a moment, and realize that you are an incredible person with immeasurable abilities to live this life in a breathtaking way. And you know best with the guidance of your ability to self-align.

Self-alignment takes practice. It takes patience. It takes faith. It takes continually asking your thoughts the question “Does this help or hurt me?” You may find a side of you that rebels against this. You may find a side of you that doesn’t believe you have to ability to guide yourself. Practice, patience and faith. You are all you need. Allow others to inspire you once you feel confident wearing the captain’s hat on your journey.

It is that simple. You are constantly creating with your thoughts, and to access the part of you that is beyond your ego is to align yourself with your soul’s purpose. Most of us don’t spend quality time with ourselves, and we’ve lost touch with our true needs and desires. Learning to change what we can and embrace what we can’t is powerful. Understanding your body’s ability to communicate with you sharpens your intuition. You will start to explore and discover these buried treasures as you align with your wise inner self.

I now realize that the person to save me is the strong woman I look at in the mirror every day. May your journey lead you to the same revelation! I send love and light to guide your journey!

Connect with Brita Corradini at her website: www.britacorradini.com

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You Tube Link to Brita’s Story – The Corradinis: Playing it Forward

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