Do you ever notice how exhausting it is trying to control everything?
Trying to fix people. Force outcomes. Make life behave the way you think it should. It’s like wrestling something that refuses to stay pinned. Are you trying to wrestle life into submission? Here’s the kicker: the harder you fight, the harder life fights back. Stop wrestling life. You’re not supposed to win that way.
I’ve learned to adjust around the edges of what is – and what cannot be changed. My habit now is to return to center when I feel myself wrestling with life.
We’ve all done it. White-knuckling decisions. Overthinking every move. Trying to manage how others see us, respond to us, or choose us. It feels productive, but it’s not. It drains our energy and keeps us stuck in a loop of frustration.
Life isn’t your opponent…
It’s your mirror. It is not something to dominate, control, or bend into submission. It is something to engage with consciously.
When you stop forcing, you start seeing. Make the conscious choice to look deeply and honestly into the mirror in front of you. When you start seeing, you make better choices.
Life reflects who you believe yourself to be. It carries the residue of past thoughts, feelings, and assumptions—the echo of old beliefs. That can be hard to admit. We live in an outer world that is very adept at the blame game. But we still have authority over our inner world. The choice is ours to decide how we live from this day forward.
Instead of asking:
“How do I make this work?”
“Why is this happening to me?”
“I don’t know how to fix this.”
Try asking:
“What is this showing me?”
“Where am I forcing instead of flowing?”
“What would a grounded, conscious choice look like here?”
That’s where your power is, so remind yourself to take your power back. It may have taken a detour, but your inner blueprint is always there, waiting to guide you back to center. Life breathes and moves within you, waiting for your direction. You are the music and the song. The melody you choose becomes the symphony you perform for yourself and the world around you.
You don’t win at life by overpowering it. You win by understanding how to move with it. So if you’re exhausted, remember this: control is an illusion, but choice isn’t.
It might not be because life is hard. It might be because you’re trying to wrestle something that was never meant to be fought.
Great reminder for us all Deb! Thank you for your keen insights.
Thanks so much Sandie – we all need reminders – it’s part of the life experience.
I love your message! Especially this part: “Life breathes and moves within you, waiting for your direction. You are the music and the song. The melody you choose becomes the symphony you perform for yourself and the world around you.”
Thank you so much for your lovely message Margaux. I know how much you and your family love writing and playing music. May the melody continue, and I can say for sure, “You are the music and the song.”
Great article, Deb. I love this:
Life isn’t your opponent…
It’s your mirror.
Such a truism, isn’t it?
Thanks, Teresa!
Another great newsletter!
I really love this: It might be because you’re trying to wrestle something that was never meant to be fought.
Happy April!
Thanks – Happy April Sunny!
Thank you again for a wonderful article. Life has gotten so much easier, not wrestling with it and going with the flow and accepting peace and tranquility in my life. If I let go and let life flow in me and through me, my days are filled with peace.
Exactly as it is meant to be BJ. Peace is a beautiful quality, enhancing our lives immeasurably. Keep the peace flowing and glowing!
Excellent article and I do appreciate each word on it!!! I am printing it out to work on it every day.
Thank you.
I am delighted to hear your comment Maria! Thank you!!