I Met A Man…

I had the pleasure of meeting the most remarkable man recently; a man who shall remain unnamed. I know he would approve with his big smile and a chuckle. As a small group of friends celebrated his 95th birthday recently, this wise and extremely savvy man shared bits and pieces of his life with us.

With dedication, determination and courage, at 85 years of age he made a conscious decision to change his life. Moving from the east coast to the west coast was the first step. By the time he was 87 he had spent 2 challenging years releasing all that was not love and joy within himself.

I rarely meet anyone this vibrant, full of energy, joy, love and inner peace. There is no falter in his steps, he is mentally sharp with a quick wit, enthusiastic about the future, says it like it is (with a few F-Bombs thrown in) bringing delight to those he engages with.  I am not kidding, he has less wrinkles than me! Everyone asks, “What’s your secret?”

I would like to share a few of this gentleman’s gems of wisdom with you…

Own your past – you created it.

Let go of all the guilt and bullshit surrounding your past if you desire to move forward in a positive manner.

When you release everything that is not love and joy, you have the most important thing – Freedom.

Love is everything. The body ages, it goes south (he shared a couple humorous comments I prefer not to share in this article!) – but the mind is where everything happens.

When inner love, peace and joy is the focus of your life, it’s better than any sex you could ever have.

People do not understand the power of the words I Am. People say: I am poor, ugly, stupid, broke, sick, tired, angry, sad, etc. When you place words these words after I Am, you give them energy and power. Be mindful, change the dialog: I am love, grateful, happy, abundant, healthy, etc.

Reaching a higher energetic frequency changes everything. Things come to you, showing up effortlessly with perfect timing, day in and day out.

Living in the moment is the key to laying the foundation for your life. While we enjoyed his birthday dinner I told him one of my quotes, “NOW is where your Naturally Occurring Wonder lives and breathes.” He beamed and loved the quote!

It’s never too late. He told us, “I am happier in the last 8 years than I have ever been. I have lived the highs and lows of life. Never think it’s too late to live a life filled with joy and happiness – it’s a choice.”

“The invariable mark of wisdom is to see the miraculous in the common.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

I like to think that when you reach 95 years of age and are happy beyond what most people can comprehend, you’ve learned a thing or two. People sabotage their happiness, blaming others for the way their life is going. This joy-filled man asked my husband and myself if we ‘got’ what he was saying about living a life of joy and happiness, filled with love. I told him I had written a book on these topics. His face lit up and with a huge smile he asked the name of my book. I told him, “Change Your Movie, Change Your Life: 7 Reel Concepts for Courageous Change.” He said he loved the name of the book and then looked deep into my eyes and asked if I would send him a copy. I said, “Yes, I would be honored and will send you a signed copy.” He was thrilled, asking me to make sure I would follow through on my promise – the next day I did.

Happy 95th Birthday & Beyond!

What I Love About Living In a Higher Frequency

From my perspective and experience, when we release negativity, fear, anger, doubt, blame and all that comes with it – life shifts. Our shit shifts when we make conscious choices that support our life. You will find that when you release negative energy, change is inevitable. There will be people you no longer resonate to energetically. You may find you move off in different directions at the perfect time and place. Here is an excerpt from my book comparing our life to a movie…

“Use your role as casting director to find people who are willing to play strong supporting roles in your movie. Many will show up to audition. Not all will make the cut simply because they don’t fit the theme of your movie. Learn to let go, and don’t try to force someone to be something they are not. Some characters will stay as long as both of you find value in each other, and then they will move on when the important role they played in your movie has ended. Learn to appreciate the significance of another’s contribution, no matter how small it may first appear to be.

It is not your calling to determine how they will choose to perform their supporting role in your movie; however, as the director of your own film, it is your call as to whether or not they remain as a member of the cast. You do not know the path others’ lives can or must take in this lifetime. Their past, present, and future choices will determine what shows up for them, just as your past, present, and future choices will determine how much joy or suffering will show up on the living screen of your life. You must be open to the possibility there may come a time when you have to let someone in a supporting role go if their performance is undermining the quality of your life.

If you want change, you need to be the captain at the helm of your own ship, like Cap’n Jack Sparrow on the Black Pearl in the movie Pirates of the Caribbean. You are sailing into the unknown to create your own adventure. Being first mate will not guarantee the results you are looking for. Someone else dictating the possible outcome does not put you in the captain’s seat.


  1. I love the newsletter this month Deb! So inspiring. Thank you.

  2. Wow, what an amazing man thank you so much for sharing this. This is the way to live especially in your later life. I know that I love my life now at 85. I know I am continuing to grow and experience new joys and adventures. Thank you Debra for writing such a beautiful article .

    • Debra Oakland says

      Yes, an amazing man. It’s never too late to live a happy life at any age! Love your comment – love you. 🙂

  3. Love this article! Love how inspiring it is to feel you can change anything at anytime, the feeling of ‘it’s never too late!’ We often get caught up believing that age defines us at any given time and that it is a barrier or block. This article and the meeting of your friend reminds us that we can change and be whoever we want to be, regardless of age at any time.
    Thank you for continuing to inspire us with your articles and insights! 🙂

    • Debra Oakland says

      Thank you Sally for your wonderful and thought-inspiring comment. To meet someone who has changed their life with purpose and on purpose at 85 years of age, sends a message to us all – it’s never too late! 🙂

  4. I love this man’s wisdom and outlook. Having just turned 70 this summer, I can certainly resonate with all that he said. I can also see where I can do even better!

    • Debra Oakland says

      People we meet who inspire us with their courage widens our perspective. I love you resonated with his words Barb!

  5. Thank you for the inspiration, Debra. I do feel we often miss out on a lot because we don’t live in the moment. It’s something I keep working on to improve.

    • Debra Oakland says

      You are welcome Vatsala. You said it – when we don’t live in our Naturally Occuring Wonder day in and day out, we can miss out on much of the true wonder life has to offer.

  6. I love the gems of wisdom you shared Debra, especially, “Never think it’s too late to live a life filled with joy and happiness – it’s a choice.” So powerful all the lessons he shared and how excited he was about your book! Thank you so much for sharing this inspiring blog!

    • Debra Oakland says

      Thank you Kelley for awesome your comment. I enjoyed writing this article immensely as I did meeting such a wonderful man. I feel blessed to be able to share his story.

  7. I enjoyed reading the pearls of wisdom he shared with you. What an inspirational man. Thank you, Debra.

  8. Debra, just love this sharing widely so many people need to read this.
    Yes your quotes sum it up beautifully- love we are on the same page xxooNOW is where your Naturally Occurring Wonder lives and breathes

  9. Debra, thanks for this great article! It was inspiring and a great read. If only we stopped to talk to more people like him every day. So much to teach. This man has accomplished so much in this lifetime.
    Loved it.

    • Debra Oakland says

      He is an wondrous soul and inspires people wherever he GLOWS. Thank you for your comment Gail. 🙂

  10. Thank you Deb! That was so awesome! I appreciate the reminder. I also really love your book.
    So grateful to have you as a beautiful supportive friend!
    Love you!

    • Debra Oakland says

      You are awesome Suzanne, thank you for your comment. We all need reminders now and again. So happy you enjoy my book and I am beyond grateful for our friendship. Love You!