The Courage to Change Your Mind

What do we do when we outgrow our views, opinions, conditioning, and stubborn unwillingness to change?

This conundrum compels us to reevaluate the life we thought we knew. Many people discover that much of what they grew up believing is false. Look at the world around us; you will see this truth in action. Internal consistency is deeply rooted in humans because it makes us feel safe.

Much like a caterpillar transforming into a butterfly

Priorities naturally shift over time. If we make a full stop and choose life-altering change, it’s like meeting ourselves anew. Embracing or accepting change can be difficult and frightening for some, like giving something up – a feeling of loss. Inner strength and courage are required. On the other hand, some embrace change with open arms. The reasons for these different reactions are varied. Consider this: Change necessitates giving something up to allow something new to emerge. Caterpillar to a Butterfly. As our world expands, new horizons intrigue and call our name.

Imagine your life as a book or a movie

You start at the beginning with a rough draft full of potential and unknown paths. There are many revisions along the way. Trust me, when writing my book, “Change Your Movie, Change Your Life,” I ventured into rabbit holes I could never have imagined. As you write your story, revisions shape your journey in unexpected ways. Like a writer, you constantly revise, shift the narrative, and edit. Life, much like a movie, is an ongoing process of editing. Letting go of what no longer serves the movie of your life and welcoming new people and experiences. Consider your characters: are they always the same at the end as they were at the beginning? Not likely. Embrace the evolution. Change your movie, and you change your life.

What we want and desire changes as we continue to grow

Change can be as simple as moving on to a new interest or phase in life. But the real challenge lies in the question, “Are you courageous enough to change your mind when you find evidence that something you honestly believed to be true is false?” This disorienting experience, where you prepare for a shift in perspective, is a testament to your strength and self-awareness. In the face of truth, you may feel you can’t continue as you were and are ready to change your future. I can’t tell you what that falsity or untruth is. But you know it’s time for change when you are presented with evidence supporting your suspicions. Remember, there is no judgment except the judgment we impose upon ourselves. We all have blind spots in our lives. Embrace them, for they are the tools that empower us to become better versions of ourselves.

Focus on the growth process rather than the end result

  • Meaningful change requires courage.
  • Be patient with yourself throughout the process, as it’s natural to feel a range of emotions.
  • If there is new information to process, take your time.
  • Understanding the reasons behind false beliefs or lies can help you process change more effectively. Consider how this new information affects your life and your future decision-making.
  • Letting go is not always easy, so take it easy on yourself.
  • If the false belief has affected others, be honest about the discovery and its implications.
  • As many grandmas used to say, “Some people couldn’t find their way out of a paper bag.” Not everyone has eyes to see and ears to hear.
  • Live your truth and lead by example. You will make a difference in people’s lives.
  • A great thought to keep in mind is that being wrong is a part of the human experience—an opportunity for learning and growth, especially when approached with courage, curiosity, open-mindedness, and resilience.
  • Onward we march, moving forward. We’ve got this!


  1. BJ welch says

    Thank you for reminding us that change is courageous and necessary. I know that I have had to adjust too many changes in my life, many of them not by choice but stronger for it. I do my best every day to live my truth, but I’m willing to change as I see it is needed.

    • Debra Oakland says

      Adjustment is a constant in all our lives. The ability to adapt to change is a courageous act in itself, which strengthens us after each challenge we overcome. Thank you for your honest comment!

  2. Thank you for another great thought provoking read.
    As you point out change is hard but having the courage to pivot when and where necessary is the key to be your own hero. Courage to change is one of the highest honors we can give to ourselves.

    • Debra Oakland says

      TYSM Sally, I appreciate your thought-provoking comments on my articles. I love that you say, “Courage to change is one of the highest honors we can give to ourselves.” Well stated!

  3. I am so excited that I found your book and get your
    newsletter. U r totally helping me navigate through
    some hard times. Thanks for your wisdom and

    • Debra Oakland says

      I’m happy you enjoyed my book and subscribed to my Living in Courage Newsletter. It is my highest goal to make a difference in the lives of others, when, and where I can. Cheers to you and thank you for subscribing Roxy!

  4. Love this Debra.
    Change was always hard for me in regard to big changes that happen suddenly.

    With courage and walking by faith I have embraced change with open arms.

    Thank you for always inspiring me.

    • Debra Oakland says

      Christine, change is hard for most people, especially when unexpected. You have had some big changes and I know you are courageous. Sending love your way. Thank you for your comment!